Writers Block
Proverbs 3:5-6
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In ALL your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight."
I would love to blame writers block 100% for my lack of attention to my writing. That would be the easy way out. In 100% honesty (and I'm always honest here) I'm going to chalk it up to partial writers block, but mainly not wanting to fully re-live the past month and a half of my life. The ups and downs have been extreme on both ends. The highs have been sky high and the lows bring me back to wanting to curl up in the corner and cry myself to sleep, which I have done often over the past month or so.
God has been teaching me to fully trust in Him and have patience (and for those that know me, patience is not my greatest asset). I may not understand everything that has been happening, but it all has been for a greater purpose and an amazing plan.
For those of you that have been keeping up with my story since the beginning you know I had a Godly man in my life. A man that I believed God had brought down from the heavens to be "the one" for me chosen by Him. As you can tell, via the past tense use of "believed", that has not turned out to be the case. I have learned that feelings of love and an emotional connection cannot be forced no matter how badly that person wants them to be there. "You can lead a heart to love, but you can't make it fall" I believe the quote goes. I went through an emotional low on, what was to be, our one year anniversary. What was funny, if there was anything funny about that day, was the fact that I didn't truly miss him per say, I missed the "what would have beens". I missed the plans that had been discussed. I missed the knowledge that the next chapter of my life (i.e. the wedding, marriage, kids, etc...) had once again been put on hold. I now realize I needed to slow down,enjoy and let God's timing be His (I am only 26), but during that day I wasn't too keen on the whole glass half full outlook.
I now realize that I wasn't fully able to be me during some of that time. I was happy and on cloud 9, but I wasn't fully able to sit back and just be who I was. I didn't really realize that until a few short weeks ago. I didn't realize that there was a whole other person in me that I had missed. I had forgotten about that girl many years ago and by the grace of God I could be her again thanks to someone bringing out that girl in me again.
God puts people in your life that will change it forever, be it a big or small change. I am still sifting through the changes and the new people that have come into me life, you know who you are, but i am willing to do the work.
As I start this new chapter in my life, I will continue to sift through everything and everyone. I will continue to laugh and smile. To be silly. To be me. To continue to surround myself around people who let me do so, once again you know who you are. And to continue to praise and give the glory to God for what He has done. He gives and takes away and what He gives, His sense of peace, surpasses everything.
I will end with a question (as always) and quote that has been on my heart.
What is stopping you from letting go? What is your writers block? What I have learned and what brought down mine was a simple 5-word quote:
"Let go and let God."
In Him and for His Glory!
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In ALL your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight."
I would love to blame writers block 100% for my lack of attention to my writing. That would be the easy way out. In 100% honesty (and I'm always honest here) I'm going to chalk it up to partial writers block, but mainly not wanting to fully re-live the past month and a half of my life. The ups and downs have been extreme on both ends. The highs have been sky high and the lows bring me back to wanting to curl up in the corner and cry myself to sleep, which I have done often over the past month or so.
God has been teaching me to fully trust in Him and have patience (and for those that know me, patience is not my greatest asset). I may not understand everything that has been happening, but it all has been for a greater purpose and an amazing plan.
For those of you that have been keeping up with my story since the beginning you know I had a Godly man in my life. A man that I believed God had brought down from the heavens to be "the one" for me chosen by Him. As you can tell, via the past tense use of "believed", that has not turned out to be the case. I have learned that feelings of love and an emotional connection cannot be forced no matter how badly that person wants them to be there. "You can lead a heart to love, but you can't make it fall" I believe the quote goes. I went through an emotional low on, what was to be, our one year anniversary. What was funny, if there was anything funny about that day, was the fact that I didn't truly miss him per say, I missed the "what would have beens". I missed the plans that had been discussed. I missed the knowledge that the next chapter of my life (i.e. the wedding, marriage, kids, etc...) had once again been put on hold. I now realize I needed to slow down,enjoy and let God's timing be His (I am only 26), but during that day I wasn't too keen on the whole glass half full outlook.
I now realize that I wasn't fully able to be me during some of that time. I was happy and on cloud 9, but I wasn't fully able to sit back and just be who I was. I didn't really realize that until a few short weeks ago. I didn't realize that there was a whole other person in me that I had missed. I had forgotten about that girl many years ago and by the grace of God I could be her again thanks to someone bringing out that girl in me again.
God puts people in your life that will change it forever, be it a big or small change. I am still sifting through the changes and the new people that have come into me life, you know who you are, but i am willing to do the work.
As I start this new chapter in my life, I will continue to sift through everything and everyone. I will continue to laugh and smile. To be silly. To be me. To continue to surround myself around people who let me do so, once again you know who you are. And to continue to praise and give the glory to God for what He has done. He gives and takes away and what He gives, His sense of peace, surpasses everything.
I will end with a question (as always) and quote that has been on my heart.
What is stopping you from letting go? What is your writers block? What I have learned and what brought down mine was a simple 5-word quote:
"Let go and let God."
In Him and for His Glory!
Comments
Post a Comment