Waiting on the Lord
"I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in His word I put my hope." Psalm 130:5
Waiting. I will be the first to say I am not a fan of the word. What makes is all the more frusterating sometimes is that it all goes back to the lesson God continues to try teach me on a daily basis... patience. If you are not a patient person, waiting can seem like a nightmare and something totally created to drive us nuts, instead of something to teach us.
Being a woman I struggle with the patience of marriage. I will admit I am THAT girl. That little girl who was dreaming of prince charming and the whole nine yards. I am that "fairy tale" type of girl. But God has a way of taking my little girl dream and bringing it into His hands and out of mine.
What some of you may not know is that I have been either close to being engaged or have been engaged a few times. Obviously, none of them worked out, considering I do NOT have a diamond on my left hand. I can also be honest and tell you, none of them were Godly relationships. Not a single one. They were covered in sin and guilt. They were covered in shame and immaturity. While these relationships were ending I can tell you that my heart was breaking. The thoughts of being unlovable, unwanted and a throw away girl were in the forefront of my mind. The thoughts of being used, cast off, a rebound kept me up at night pining for answers. All I wanted was to be loved, truly and unconditionally loved. Was that so much to ask for? I was beginning to think so.
What I now realize is that I was looking for love and acceptance in all the wrong places. How does this have to do with waiting you may ask? Well I was waiting on that perfect love. On a man to love me unconditionally, to call me his. A man to get down on one knee and tell me he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. I never had any patience in this form of waiting (especially when it was happening to all my friends left and right. I am happy for y'all by the way!).
What I finally realized was that the unconditional love and acceptance I was looking for was within my grasp the whole time. What I realized is that I could have all that I ever wanted if I had a relationship with Jesus Christ. I could have all the love and acceptance I wanted. God would love me for me. He would love me no matter my past and my sins. He would hold me in His arms and love me no matter what! Trying to fathom that love is impossible for me. The God who created the universe loves me so very much. Wow...!
Knowing this amazing fact has taught me to wait on God's timing. To trust in God's perfect timing. I will NOT say though that I do not get antsy from time to time. Or that I don't get over excited or start planning the wedding in my head on date #3 (come on girls... you know you do it too). I will tell you though, that portion of me has been tamed down a bit over the years. I now wait to plan after date #5 (just kidding guys). But seriously girls, we do that stuff at some point in time. We all want to have our dads walk us down the aisle and wear the long white dress. BUT... it's all in HIS timing. Not ours.
Last year, I thought I had found the one God had sent for me. All my girlfriends knew it too. I talked about it allt he time (just ask any one of them... sorry girls). He was wonderful. He was a Godly man. He was a strong Southern man. He treated me like a princess. But as most of you know, he was not God's "Chosen" for me (at least that's the way it really seems at this point). This man was put in my life to teach me. To show me what a true Christian relationship should look like. How I deserve to be treated. I learned that the man should pay for dinner, open my car/truck door, help me carry things, hold my purse, hold my hand, etc...( and yes, this man did all that for me and more), but he was not God's "Chosen" for me. I also learned that a pat of me was hidden during the relationship and I now know am free to be that part of me again. Did the relationship ending hurt? YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT! Was it hard letting someone go who you thought God has created just for YOU? OH MY GOODNESS YES! But the only thing I knew I could rest on was God's love for me and His plan for my life.
I cannot tell you how many nights I would lay awake and think, "God has chosen me to be one of those 'single forever' girls." And I cannot tell you how many of my girlfriends laughed in my face and told me to stop thinking so foolishly. I am not ashamed to say my age... I am only 26 years old. I am the baby among my girlfriends and they would probably kill me for saying that I am not getting any younger, therefore I won't go there. But waiting is the hardest part. That is what my past relationship taught me. It taught me to slow down, have fun, go with the flow and trust in His all knowing and perfect timing for my life. I have come to find out that things are a lot less stressful on both parties when I take this approach. Who would have thought... Haha... I digress.
Waiting on God's timing is not easy. It seems as though everything is in the guys hands. He is supposed to ask you out. He is supposed to be the one to call. He is the one who asks for your hand in marriage. It all seems like him, him , him. But in reality, he is also looking to God too and waiting. If he is not at peace with the relationship he is also waiting on God's timing. Now waiting to see what the next step is and what he needs to do from there. They wait too, but it's just a very different type of waiting. (Had to help the guys out here a bit)
Waiting stinks. It's hard and it tries our patience every moment of the day. But just think about what God has in store for us. Just think, if I thought the last guy I dated was amazing, I can't wait to see what and who God has in store for me to marry. I mean... WOW! That thought gets me through my lack of impatience when it rears it's ugly head. I mediate that God has someone who will let me be me at all times. Someone who will let me be silly. Someone who will let me be weak for that one moment when needed. God has someone like that for me. I just have to WAIT and be patient. All I know, is that the having fun, taking it slow and waiting will all pay off and it's actually a pretty cool feeling.
My question to you is this, what are you waiting on? As you can tell, for me it's God's "Chosen" for me, but what are you specifically waiting on? Is it the same as me? A job? A new home? A baby? Or are you just waiting for God to move in your life? Waiting is not easy, but I can tell you this, with God it makes it all the more better when you see what He has on the other end for you. Be patient and wait my brothers and sisters. Just wait and see when the God of the universe that created you and I has in store for you.
In Him and For His Glory!
Waiting. I will be the first to say I am not a fan of the word. What makes is all the more frusterating sometimes is that it all goes back to the lesson God continues to try teach me on a daily basis... patience. If you are not a patient person, waiting can seem like a nightmare and something totally created to drive us nuts, instead of something to teach us.
Being a woman I struggle with the patience of marriage. I will admit I am THAT girl. That little girl who was dreaming of prince charming and the whole nine yards. I am that "fairy tale" type of girl. But God has a way of taking my little girl dream and bringing it into His hands and out of mine.
What some of you may not know is that I have been either close to being engaged or have been engaged a few times. Obviously, none of them worked out, considering I do NOT have a diamond on my left hand. I can also be honest and tell you, none of them were Godly relationships. Not a single one. They were covered in sin and guilt. They were covered in shame and immaturity. While these relationships were ending I can tell you that my heart was breaking. The thoughts of being unlovable, unwanted and a throw away girl were in the forefront of my mind. The thoughts of being used, cast off, a rebound kept me up at night pining for answers. All I wanted was to be loved, truly and unconditionally loved. Was that so much to ask for? I was beginning to think so.
What I now realize is that I was looking for love and acceptance in all the wrong places. How does this have to do with waiting you may ask? Well I was waiting on that perfect love. On a man to love me unconditionally, to call me his. A man to get down on one knee and tell me he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. I never had any patience in this form of waiting (especially when it was happening to all my friends left and right. I am happy for y'all by the way!).
What I finally realized was that the unconditional love and acceptance I was looking for was within my grasp the whole time. What I realized is that I could have all that I ever wanted if I had a relationship with Jesus Christ. I could have all the love and acceptance I wanted. God would love me for me. He would love me no matter my past and my sins. He would hold me in His arms and love me no matter what! Trying to fathom that love is impossible for me. The God who created the universe loves me so very much. Wow...!
Knowing this amazing fact has taught me to wait on God's timing. To trust in God's perfect timing. I will NOT say though that I do not get antsy from time to time. Or that I don't get over excited or start planning the wedding in my head on date #3 (come on girls... you know you do it too). I will tell you though, that portion of me has been tamed down a bit over the years. I now wait to plan after date #5 (just kidding guys). But seriously girls, we do that stuff at some point in time. We all want to have our dads walk us down the aisle and wear the long white dress. BUT... it's all in HIS timing. Not ours.
Last year, I thought I had found the one God had sent for me. All my girlfriends knew it too. I talked about it allt he time (just ask any one of them... sorry girls). He was wonderful. He was a Godly man. He was a strong Southern man. He treated me like a princess. But as most of you know, he was not God's "Chosen" for me (at least that's the way it really seems at this point). This man was put in my life to teach me. To show me what a true Christian relationship should look like. How I deserve to be treated. I learned that the man should pay for dinner, open my car/truck door, help me carry things, hold my purse, hold my hand, etc...( and yes, this man did all that for me and more), but he was not God's "Chosen" for me. I also learned that a pat of me was hidden during the relationship and I now know am free to be that part of me again. Did the relationship ending hurt? YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT! Was it hard letting someone go who you thought God has created just for YOU? OH MY GOODNESS YES! But the only thing I knew I could rest on was God's love for me and His plan for my life.
I cannot tell you how many nights I would lay awake and think, "God has chosen me to be one of those 'single forever' girls." And I cannot tell you how many of my girlfriends laughed in my face and told me to stop thinking so foolishly. I am not ashamed to say my age... I am only 26 years old. I am the baby among my girlfriends and they would probably kill me for saying that I am not getting any younger, therefore I won't go there. But waiting is the hardest part. That is what my past relationship taught me. It taught me to slow down, have fun, go with the flow and trust in His all knowing and perfect timing for my life. I have come to find out that things are a lot less stressful on both parties when I take this approach. Who would have thought... Haha... I digress.
Waiting on God's timing is not easy. It seems as though everything is in the guys hands. He is supposed to ask you out. He is supposed to be the one to call. He is the one who asks for your hand in marriage. It all seems like him, him , him. But in reality, he is also looking to God too and waiting. If he is not at peace with the relationship he is also waiting on God's timing. Now waiting to see what the next step is and what he needs to do from there. They wait too, but it's just a very different type of waiting. (Had to help the guys out here a bit)
Waiting stinks. It's hard and it tries our patience every moment of the day. But just think about what God has in store for us. Just think, if I thought the last guy I dated was amazing, I can't wait to see what and who God has in store for me to marry. I mean... WOW! That thought gets me through my lack of impatience when it rears it's ugly head. I mediate that God has someone who will let me be me at all times. Someone who will let me be silly. Someone who will let me be weak for that one moment when needed. God has someone like that for me. I just have to WAIT and be patient. All I know, is that the having fun, taking it slow and waiting will all pay off and it's actually a pretty cool feeling.
My question to you is this, what are you waiting on? As you can tell, for me it's God's "Chosen" for me, but what are you specifically waiting on? Is it the same as me? A job? A new home? A baby? Or are you just waiting for God to move in your life? Waiting is not easy, but I can tell you this, with God it makes it all the more better when you see what He has on the other end for you. Be patient and wait my brothers and sisters. Just wait and see when the God of the universe that created you and I has in store for you.
In Him and For His Glory!
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